Updated version 2.0

I gave in (as the previous post reveals)

• Not because I found I couldn´t live without them, as the shopassistent assumed, as I entered the shop again, currious if I were lucky not to be too late for my second love

• Not because ”men like women who love shoes”

No – what caused my last resistence to disappear, and me giving in giving myself the shoes I´ve been fantasizing of, was a story from my good friend.
She´s the kind I admire for her vitality, strenght and struggles. After her telling me an anecdote from her youth, where she was asked by her man please always when in town together to walk in the gutter, so she would never appear to be taler than him – I went with my long legs right away to by the high heeled shoes.
Here we go, updated women´s libber on sky heels in honor of L, who of all doesn´t belong in the gutter.

Ooops

I did it again

Breath away

I have started breathing. Or rather to be concise tonglen. A word for breathing in pain or sorrow and breathing out relief, spaciousness or what ever is soothing.
Yes, I do find it strange and a bit ridiculous as I read about it (just as you might find my words here..).
Yes, it is true, it rhymes and associates with my former hair color - and that henna head is long gone!
Nevertheless I can´t help but admitting, that practice is good despite of prejudices.
I am not sure if it will save the world or mankind, but I am quite sure it does me better than does walking around knocking holes in the air with the gals.
So if there´s a warm imaginary breath on your frozen cheeck, say hi.

- Did I just write that?
- Yep
- Freak!
- Yep...

Top

Since the coffee didn´t came to me, I dared to leave the blankets and were rewarded.
The new Ndaroini Kenya AA Top at The Coffee Collective definitely is a freezing cold bikeride worth.
Blackcurrant aromas welcomed me from the cup with exactly the hint of summer, I were so in need of today.

Best

Best are wooden socks, blankets and shawls. Tee and another blanket.
Wearing boots and a heavy jacket in the kitchen and the bathroom is wired but best.
Best would be to stay in bed having a warm delivery of croissants and coffee.

Nutshell

Friday I fell in love twice. I only gave in once.
They were very diffent. Opposite in fact.
Both suited me well.
After many inner pros and cons I made my choise and we went home together and haven´t been appart except from when sleeping ever since.
My mum would have approved my choice, if I had asked for her opinion, which i didn´t.

And here I am, two days have passed, I do fell very at home with the chosen, down to earth and giving me a sense of being a bikerchick again..... but I can´t help ongoing fantasizing about the other.

Is it too late?
Will I be turned down, if I appear tomorrow, saying I´ve changed my mind?
Maybe somebody else ran away with the chosen.
It always is a risk when letting go of something precious.

If it happens to be the case, I will seek comfort in the fact that there are other lovely shoes in the world...

These are a quite new love from December 08 still giving me the
za za zuu

Heard in Trois Pommes

I hate lacking phone manners, but today I was caught with a shopping lady speaking on the cell phone among styles on sale, and for once I didn´t feel like teaching her about phone manners, I was silenced:

"Yeah, it was wonderful to see you again....
mm...yeah....
It always makes me thoughtful and sad the following day
It´s magnificent how sparks are flying when we´re together...
...damn you´re married......"

Hell yeah. Ouch! An empathic impulse felt like squeezing her arm.
In the midst of a 50% sale the phonecall was a reminder for all the surrounders of the high price experience, though primeval, the kind only learned by own experience.
And there´s no discount – it´s a classic.

Parting kiss

A qoutation from today´s curriculum of ”Problem solving – learning to be an expert" occured to me while the parting hour of this year is approaching, Sting is bussy planning A brand new day and there is an ongoing sms-thread philosophizing if starting afresh is possible.
I guess so.... what ever..... I´ll do it anyway, begining with the last swim in Øresund - that indeed is refreshing!

"Finally, intuitively, we also learn from our mistakes. The theory stresses the subjective nature of errors characterising them as conflicts between what the learner believes ought to be true and what is percieved to be the case. The learning that occurs results in a specialisation of the knowledge structures being used, so that they can come to be applied under more appropriate conditions in the future.”

According to this theory, I will approach next year as an expert...
But one thing is theory – in practice the remaining part still is to come to terms with the new representations of reality. And as I am in the profound mood I can´t help but wonder if I really would wish to have missed the wonderful, miserable detours, that my mistaken beliefs led me too this year..
What is certain is we´re starting up a brand new day and we´ll do it tomorrow really early since I am of to work 5.50.

How to start afresh

Enough

My neighbour and I are waking up with a new insight this morning: My threshold is lower at 3.31 in the night! Zip - the tolerance was gone as i woke up in an inferno of bassrythms and playstation sounds.
Finally the dragon was aroused.

Love & hate

God how I love my B&W loudspeakers in this very moment - they have an awesome sound when allowed to volume up. And the permisssion is given right now as I am desperately hating my neighbour and his loudspeakers´ permission to burst into a bass making my bookcases shiver, my brain colapse while exceeding my tolerance threshold.
For the first time looking forward to the 1. st. of February and the exile in CPH.

Glimpse of life

I woke up to great news this morning. My friend gave birth to a babyboy as I was asleep. A sense of wonder and gratitude stroke through the freezing fog covering Øresund and me this morning, and it got me out of the laird, which I wish I could stay in till spring and life returns.
Welcome into this life little messenger of hope, I guess when you struggled through the dark tunnel to get here, I will manage it too. - Cognition Psychology study - here I come and you better make it an easy delivery for me today!

Pert hankies

A friend reached the "weiter im Text"-step today - for her and everybody else here´s backup from a box/Wulffmorgenthaler:

Reasons to wake

Today is not one of those days. 5.30 am. is not a time for wondering if I am looking forward to anything, the answer would probably be no in case.
It just begins. Out of the duvets and on the bike under a starry sky with quiet Hayden in the ears of to another day messing about in the kitchen.
It showed up that the day had a lot of things to look forward to...
Good collegues bright smiling welcoming me to be their guest cook of the day, buns turning out very well and then - as I came home - a book with beautiful drawings was delivered with love and hope from Australia. It is about a red haired girl who wakes up to one of those days beginning with nothing to look forward to...
One day, when I´ll have one of those or when I´ll get my Mac coorporating with my scanner, I´ll bring some of the wonderful and spot-on drawings here.
For now, the red here enjoys the rest of the day she didn´t knew, she was looking forward to.

Afghanian Viagra

What seems to be a strange and questionable US war strategy at the same time seems to be good news for Aghanian women. Viagra is given to Afghanian warriors in return for important informations - no holds are barred in the war against terror - nor in the struggle of satisfying many wifes.